Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Like trying to predict the rain

Yesterday I received a phone call telling me my mom had a stroke.  My first inclination, of course, was to run over to the hospital to see her and then I realized, as I've had to realize many times over the past year, that it wasn't an option.  My power chair doesn't fit into anything but accessible vehicles, and there's no bus that goes over there.  I have no available accessible transportation.

My sister went over after getting the message (she had been out all morning) and then called me to say that there is some paralysis, but that my mom was eating. I asked questions, trying to figure out what was going on and when I hung up the phone, I was filled with a feeling I've had often over the past year or so this has been going on: frustration. Sheer frustration that I can not get at what I need to do when I need to do it.

I've learned that trying to imagine what one will need with quadriplegia isn't easy. It's like trying to predict the rain in a way.   And then affording it is yet another issue.

There are many others like myself who live day to day with these restrictions.  How many people would want to visit their mom in the hospital after she had a stroke? Heck, wouldn't everybody? 

I did a poll that included mobility and transportation issues for people with disabilities. It was far less popular than the peeps and bunny poll that Meredith is doing now. But basically it shows these are concerns for many in our community. Just getting around, things that we take for granted, are an issue. Although not as popular as peeps and bunnies.

It could happen to any one of us, is the thing.  

My mom told me that it's okay, she understands I can't get there. I'm trying to decipher from her slurred words exactly what's going on.  I'll know more after the doctor does a consult.

It's like trying to predict the rain.


Anonymous said...

Hey I'm a quadriplegic too. I couldn't find a van or anything I could afford. I couldn't go anywhere and when stuff happened I was stuck. Then I moved to be near a bus but it only went certain places and sometimes the drivers didn't stop to pick me up so I got stranded. Finally I got a van a friend was selling real cheap plus my parents helped me too. Good luck. I hope your mom is okay .


Ruth said...

Thanks, appreciate it. I know about bus drivers that whiz right by too.

Wheelchair Dancer said...

Hey Ruth!

My best wishes for your mother's recover and a huge hug for you.

This is so unbelievably frustrating. And if more people understood, I have to believe the situation would change. In the meantime, I am thinking of you and yours.


Ruth said...

thanks WCD! I really agree that things would change if more people understood.

Julie said...

I'm sorry about your mom. Hoping she recovers well. She's in my prayers.

I'm sorry for your not being able to get to her right away as you wanted to. Gotta be painfully frustrating.

Ruth said...

Thanks. Yeah it's hard not being able to see people because I don't have transportation. I did get to see her at Christmas though.

Kara said...

My prayers are with you and your mother Ruth..I hope you can find a way to see her soon but I'm sure she knows you're there in your heart.

Ruth said...

Thanks so much for your kind words, Kara :)

Courageous Grace said...

I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I too know how frustrating it is to desperately want to visit your mother in the hospital but are unable to do so, when my mom had her stroke in October they were afraid she had some sort of contagious illness and because I was pregnant at the time I wasn't allowed to go see her.

I will keep you and your family in my prayers, sweety.

Ruth said...

Thanks CG - am sorry to hear about what happened to you. It's hard . At least now I have some more information trickling in-- which is quite positive.

I thank everyone for their prayers and good wishes.

Anonymous said...

Keeping you and your mom in my prayers, Ruth.

Ruth said...

Thanks very much, Janet.