Platitudes and Attitudes

I was laying in bed last night comforting my kitten Riley when this idea for a blog post occurred to me.

Riley was abandoned outside at about five to six months old when his owners moved. We sleep with a light on because he's afraid of the dark. And when it's dark and it rains he quivers in fear from the sound of the rain. When he gets that scared I sit up with him and talk to him until he calms down.

Of course I could just tell him to buck up or that he should be grateful he has a new home. I could toss platitudes at him. But that's not going to reach him when he's that frightened and upset.

Sometimes I also sit with people who have problems so big they're afraid too. Their age doesn't matter. Some have worn out the patience of friends who start throwing platitudes at them because they assume it's an attitude issue.

If you only did this, their friends might say, or if you reframe it...or perhaps being good Christians they might toss some bible verses out there. I guess they never read Job because thats exactly what his buddies did. And they threw in some good rationalizations as to why it happened to Job too. He must have sinned. He must have displeased God.

Sometimes they say their friends are angry at them and often they walk away, abandoning them when things are at their worst. You've changed they say or you won't change and sadly the person is often blamed for a problem not even of his or her own making.


I believe, as Quakers say, that there is that of God in all of us. I also believe it is up to us to serve others, to be the hand of God, the face of God, the voice that reassures and calms others in dire need.

Although there are times we all need an attitude adjustment, when folks are facing huge overwhelming financial, health or personal issues, they need a listening nonjudgmental ear, not platitudes or attitudes thrown at them.