Darwinism reversed: natural selection favors slower snails

How many times when I was in a manual wheelchair, pushing more slowly because of paralysis in my arms, I heard people tell me to get out of the way? Going slower is like a sin in certain parts of the country, especially in the NY metro region. The gestures, the facial contortions, the absolute frustration it caused whenever I went slower was a sight to behold.

So how ironic it is to find out that natural selection is favoring snails with slower metabolisms. A study, which was quite easily done apparently because a biologist said it was easy to recover the dead "because of their shells and because they did not move more than a couple of metres each year" , shows that the 'energetic definition of fitness" theory "predicts that animals that spend less energy will have more surplus for survival and reproduction,"

Ha.

They found size did not predict which animals survived. But metabolic rate did, with surviving snails having a metabolic rate 20% lower than that of the snails that didn't survive. And the lower each snail's metabolic rate, the greater its chance of survival. That means that nature is selecting for snails that are more energy efficient, says Nespolo.

So check it out, my friends. Being more energy efficient is what counts in the long run. But still - they need to figure out if having a slow metabolism is linked to moving slowly. Which would be great to know, the next time someone gets mad at you if you're on a cane, crutches, wheels, etc. You could tell the irate person about the "energetic definition of fitness" and how natural selection favors lower metabolic rates.

So slow down.