Balance and your prayer life

“Problems arise in that one has to find a balance between what people need from you and what you need for yourself.” Jessye Norman


As Catholics, we need to be mindful of the balance to keep between the service work we do for others and our own prayer life. I know that, in order to keep the right perspective, I must attend to my own spiritual well being and physical needs.

It is often difficult for many of us to choose how to manage our time. It is true that we all have more time than we think. To simply say "I'm too busy" when someone needs help from us because we think we are busier than anyone else in the world is not a good spiritual practice. On the other hand , it can be as harmful to say yes all of the time because we are worried about what people will think of us!

My life circumstances have placed me in a position where I've had to learn how to find this balance. My body lets me know quickly when I've crossed the line physically and being tired turns into exhaustion. It was a great struggle at first to accept that I had physical limits that weren't going to go away. I also had to learn to deal with the fear that I was no longer useful to anyone else because I had those limits. That, I learned, is a fallacy.

The reality is that I had to learn balance. Before my accident, I plowed through life as a Type A professional with a calendar so full that I rarely had time to consider how I was spending my days. I did make time to help other people, but the reality was that I did not place a high priority on my prayer life at times. It was relegated to the back seat sometimes or done on the fly in a way that wasn't very fruitful.

Ironically, becoming paralyzed is a dramatic way of reaching a crossroads. Suddenly you cannot move. You are dependent until you learn how to do things on your own in a different way. BEcause of this, you have a lot more time to talk to God and pray.

The issue as to whether you will be able to return to your life as it was before becomes a very public one discussed by your doctors, occupational and physical therapists, social workers and friends and family. Some may be so concerned that they overprotect you while a few people place unrealistic demands on you out of their own anxiety that you remain the person you were before.

You are, so to speak, in the middle. It occurs to you that you're the only one who knows how you feel physically and that it is your body and your future life.

In my case, this was my crossroads. I had to talk to God. I had to learn how to pray and pray often.

I face decisions every day as to how to spend my energies, just like everyone else. I know my parameters better than before yet am always hopeful that I can increase my overall health by exercising, eating right and staying positive. I strive to do the most I can while being realistic.

The prayer I say most often is: "God, please give me the strength to do Your will; the humility to accept my limits and the limits of other people ; the gratitude to acknowledge what I receive and the willingness to give to others."

This reminds me that, not only am I dealing with issues of balance, but everyone around me is on the same journey.