You people

I always know when I see emails that start with "you people" that my eyebrows, which still work, are going to go up.

The phrase "you people", when directed at any minority, including people with disabilities, is never persuasive to use in an argument.

The phrase "we the people", however, sounds really nice. You'll notice that our founding fathers did not put "you people" in the Constitution. Nor did they use the phrase "those people" or "people who look/sound/dress like that".

I first heard "you people" from a teacher. He used to get up and say "you people are lazy" and "you people will never amount to anything". I went home and told my grandmother who said "people like that" shouldn't be teachers.

Of course, it wasn't the last time I heard "you people". I learned that there were others who used the phrase, in much worse ways. They didn't stand in front of a class and call a group of students lazy or worthless, but singled out minorities. "You people" was the preface to discrimination, because it assumed things about a group as a whole, without getting to know those in the group. It was a way to put people deemed not to be as worthy of respect in their place. It was a way to dehumanize people.

"You people have a sense of entitlement."

"You people want everything."

"You people think you're as good as everyone else."

Ugly words like this have nothing to do with "we the people". Such phrases are full of assumptions about the other person and his or her situation. Sadly, there's no room for "we the people" in there, or what kind of solutions we as a country will find together.

Nowadays when I hear the phrase "you people" followed by judgmental statements or assumptions , the sound of a door closing rings in my ears. It is like a parent saying to a child that this conversation, this dialogue is over because their mind is made up.

How many times have we the people in this country allowed some of us to talk to minorities like children? How dare people do that to other adults? I find it laughable some days when one moment I see a person with a disability patronized like that and in the next moment that same person is expected to overcome insurmountable odds because of barriers that we, as a society, perpetuate.

Every day for the past month I've gone past a strip of road where a friend of mine who has CP works tirelessly to clear away leaves and tree branches. It's a side job he does every year to supplement the money he gets. He can only do it for a few hours at a time, because he has difficulty walking and standing for too long but nevertheless he does it to pay his rent and buy his food, even though there are people in town who offer to help him with those costs. He doesn't "want everything", just what others have - the ability to live independently in the community.

Like the story the First Lady tells about her father, who worked with MS, there are many people with disabilities who work. Some work full time. Others work when they can, as they can. Many work for low or no pay, but we don't hear about that often. I hope others get a chance to tell their stories too, so that "we the people" learn it's not an exception that people with disabilities are hard workers. More would be, given the opportunity. And many people with disabilities do work tirelessly as volunteers, when and if they can. I thank the First Lady for opening the door on that dialogue and encourage others to continue it. It's important to hear about how productive people with disabilities are every day.

But it's also important to note that some people with disabilities can't work. Judging someone's innate worth on the basis of whether he or she is productive is based on the same belief system that condoned the euthanasia of those who were seen as burdens on society. This is a dangerous and slippery slope in our society still - one that we haven't had a dialogue about out in the open. It results in poor health care for many, poor housing, poor transportation and hunger.

When we forget that we are all part of "we the people" and think of others as "you people", it is everyone's loss, no matter what words come after those first two.