Positive criticism

Some people may think that those two words can't fit together - but they can and I've learned a lot more in life from folks who criticize me than anyone else, but usually when they go about it in a positive way. Some folks are just better at it than others, but I think it's also a skill you can learn.

I found these suggestions online in an article called The Joy of Criticism about how to give criticism, and stay positive:

1.

Become more aware of yourself. Seek out information about yourself and actively solicit criticism through questions such as, "How could I be doing this better?"
2.

Become more aware of the people you are criticizing. Consider their emotions, actions, and feelings.
3.

Acknowledge the necessary subjectivity of your observations.
4.

Give concrete and fair criteria for criticizing.
5.

Lead not only through words but through actions. Set a good example, and follow up on criticism with questions such as, "How can I help?"


I've noticed that those who give negative criticism (you can find a list here in the article) generally don't follow most, if any of these criteria. Even following a few can be very helpful in terms of having your criticism heard, rather than discounted, although the article talks about ways to handle negative criticism.

So why is this even important? Being on the receiving end of positive criticism is a learning opportunity, for one thing. Learning to stretch so you can hear negative criticism may also be to your benefit at times. And when criticism is given positively, it really can be - and often is - an act of love.