Be still...

"Be still
and know
that I am God."

Psalm 46:10

Paralysis is a funny thing. It teaches many lessons.

One of them is how to sit still.

I don't mean the literal sense of sitting in a wheelchair and not being able to move my legs. I can get around (probably more quickly than most people who walk) in my wheelchair and, to be honest with you, until someone reminds me of it, I don't think about not being able to walk. Usually that comes up if there's a physical barrier like steps or something I can't quite reach because I'm sitting down.

Paralysis and the sense of being still has more to do with those moments when I am out of my wheelchair - when I get into bed or easy chair or - ahem- the floor. It is then that I realize how paralyzed I am and often I opt to just stay still instead of trying to fight it. I don't struggle to turn over in bed, for example, because it's a complicated manuever requiring a trapeze and dexterity that late at night reminds me of the Flying Wallendas. Instead, I land in bed and - stay still. Or I get into my easy chair and just - stay still.

This may sound frightening to you if you've never been more paralyzed than that feeling you get when you go to the dentist and your mouth gets numbed. At first, I'll admit, I was terrified! But over time I've become used to it. And, like I said, it's taught me many lessons.

One is how to pray and center myself. I feel as if I'm cheating, to be honest, because it's so much easier for me than able bodied people.

If the phone rings, forget it. I'm not moving.
If someone comes to the door, forget it. Not moving.
If the cat knocks something over - well you get the idea.

I'm praying. I'm centering myself. I'm with God. And, yes, I'm paralyzed. But I prefer to think of it as being "still".

It's also very easy to feel humble. God is the Almighty and Powerful and I am still. I cannot even move in his Presence. So I pray. It's a natural progression from that position. It all begins in my heart, where I admit to God that I am powerless and He is all Powerful.

Yes, being paralyzed has taught me many lessons.